It is a part of life, and i disagree if we get into it too much as parent. Let our child to handle the matter alone sometime is a good decision. It gives them the experience to solve their social problem and handle the situation at their own.
“Mummy, the girl in my school bus bully me. she told everyone not to be my friend!”
What would you do if you are the mother. Would you right away jump up your seat and call up the school or the teacher and report the matter and ask the school to act on it immediately. I am not surprise if some parents might be doing it.
But in my case! I did not. I choose to discuss the matter with my daughter. I ask her to explain further to me what is actually happened. I try to make her see a different side of the point and put empathy to the girl that she had mentioned. It is possible she was responding to what my daughter might do to her.
I give her some options on how to handle the situation.
1. i told her to avoid the girl by not making any contact to her, even eye contact.
2. i told her to get herself busy with other thing and forget about the girl who probably is seeking for everyone attention on the bus.
3. i told her to remain calm and respond bravely if the girl happened to act on her again. i told her to tell the girl that my daughter will be reporting the matter to me and eventually to school.
4. i even told her not to be sad because the world is SO BIG, and there are many other wonderful things she had and will have and take this matter as a small part of her life and part of her growing up.
5. i also told her, there will be bully everywhere in her life. she can not stop it because she can not control other people. what she can do is to control herself on how to respond to the situation.
Believe me! it might not be easy! BUT giving in the situation and take it as opportunity to train her social maturity is another good thing.
the only thing i told HER to take it very seriously when THE other CHILD take physical abuse to my daughter like hitting, biting, pinching etc.
It takes quite sometimes for my daughter to eventually overcome the situation, i could say about 3 weeks.
it is also probably i have the opportunity to be in the school bus with the rest of the kids when i did the volunteer job for the school. I took that opportunity to build bonding with those kids especially the one that bully my daughter. I make personal contact with them by being involved on their discussion without raising any issue that my daughter had with them.
So far the situation had been improved, there is no more complaint from my daughter.
At least for now …. her LIFE is still evolving many more to come.
cheers! good night all.