Over Scheduling!

Honestly for the past 3 days i had been thinking hard about what am i going to do with my daughter schedule! She is such a busy girl full with activities after school. Some of the activities are carried forward since her preschool time, like Balet, Piano, Drawing and Kumon. And believe me she enjoys every one of them! Everytime we asked her which one she wants to drop she would said …. none …

me and my husband do not believe on feeding her school related activities after school, except Kumon, i purposely hold Kumon strongly and my daughter knows why Kumon is important for her. She even put Kumon in number 1 when i asked her to list down all her outside school activities by priority. She took time to think about it and finally come up with Kumon as her first priority. She said it herself, it helps her in school with her mathematic and english subject.

the rest of her other activities are preparing her for hobby such as piano, dance and art. however we take these very light, we do not emphasize her to do well on this area and rushing her for test or examination. we takes time and let her learn with fun. we do not want to stress her with expectation for her to pass certain grade and level at certain time. these are not priority … these are just hobbies for her. we introduce the hobby for her and give her exposure, she will one day decide which one she likes the best and would love to keep eventually. with these classes i go very easy, when i see her tired, i do not force her to get up and get ready for the class. i want her to go to that class with fun and smile. i even told the teacher not too worry if her progress is very slow on these area, we do not mind at all. the teacher is clear about it as well …. so no rush for exam, competition or even performance.

she understand clearly that school is her first priority. the good result from school is very important and that is what we expect from her to do well in school. she also understand that she has to drop any of her extra classes if she is not performing well in school, regardless the grade or level she might have by that time. we keep telling her school is important for her future, and all the other activities are to support her self development and hobby. i keep telling her, people with a lot of hobbies are indeed happy people. they always find way to keep themselves busy and occupy. being productive in positive way is one recipe of living happy.

therefore last night, i sit down with her at the dining table. we both were discussing about her activities after school. i asked her to list down all the activities and put next to it the benefit she will get from that activities according to herself. i let her freely express what she feels about those classes. you might be surprise to see what she come up with. most of these class she put as fun, meets friends, play with friends and learn new things. i also ask her to put heart sign if she loves it, the more the heart sign the more it is become her favorite. from all her extra activities she put tony buzan as her most favorite classes and kumon as her last. but when i ask her to put stars for IMPORTANCE, she put KUmon the first and tony buzan in the middle. so i guess she knows each of the class, what are they for her.

i purposely told her as well that we have to cancel the class based on priority from bottom to top at any time she is not performing in school cause of being exhausted over too many schedule.

when i finish that discussion with her i see her sit still and see her own list and table … i am sure she learns something from that discussion, setting up priority and importance of things in her life. i hope that become a useful life skill for her one day.

and i am super GLAD! we engage her in class NOT because other is doing it … it is because her own {my daughter} clear conscious mind of choice.